Pam!

Hiya guys. Sorry about the very emotional posts. Been through some really bad waves and tides but I'll get through. For now, this is a happy picture of me! Was taken at college, at my new hideout place. It's a nice place to calm your thoughts and work your way through. I definitely need a time off. Can't wait to blog about my free movie experience! :)

Note: I really didn't realise my hair was THAT blonde! So amazed! I had a good hair day :D And yes my hair is growing. It's really much longer now :D

Sometimes, I want to cry and huddle in a corner. I just really wish I could ignore the sounds of the overwhelming pain and sadness. They say that I was given this life because I was strong enough to live it. I really seriously doubt that at times. I don't feel any better. I don't feel as if I have achieved anything.  Or at least..I don't know what I'm doing.

I think..I really need to step up and start taking the scene.

I used to think that, I'm better with talking right now.





Guess I'm not after all. 

Regardless

My results for the first term were surprisingly good. I really thought I wasn't going to do well but I am quite pleased with the results. There is definitely room for improvement. I am learning to become a better graphic designer. It's really helping me to shape my thinking towards green thinking and sustainability. So far, it's been getting busy but I'm taking a short break from work to write this out. My brain is currently not working at a fast pace! I need to work more. I spent the day trying to figure out my theme and persona which I have at last. Sort of but it still needs more to work on! Though, I am still currently thinking about how can I appeal to them. 

Anyways, I'm still working on it. 

Need to stay positive and calm!

No pictures for the day sadly but well, there's lots to do. xx

Give me;

Give me the wisdom, strength and energy to fight this battle. I cannot win this battle on my own.

I am motivated but at the same time, I want to not overstress myself. I'm going through such a tide now, I find it so difficult to breathe. But I know I can do this. I have go to try at least to make it work. At least to try and understand and think clearly. 

But man, I think I might just like break one of these days.

The Fault in Our Stars

The moment I finished reading the book, I sat on my bed in awe and tears started to form. Sooner or later, I was crying a river. I didn't think such a simple yet heartwarming book could make me cry. It reminded me of Mitch Albom all over again. But John Green is definitely on my favourite author list. There is no doubt about that. Fancy vocabulary cannot describe how beautiful the book is written. It was a simple book. No complications about that. There was no awkward linear chronology plot. It was just a book.

I didn't ever think it was going to had a lot of impact in me. This unprecedented feeling.

I think I might take time to recollect and compose myself after this. I didn't cry a lot but after reading, it left me feeling bitter and so shit about life. How could you be so cruel at times? Turning to that last page, it just left me speechless. Like that's it? That's how it's going to be?

My words would do no justice to this book but as far as words can describe this book: astounding, aspiring and humour. It is like what Jodi Picoult (another favourite author of mine) had said: It's just filled with staccato bursts of humour and tragedy. I would not dare to rate this book as well, I don't find ratings doing any justice to any sort of book but if I must say, it is definitely a recommended read.

I am planning to get his other novels and read them as well. Will be searching for his other novels tomorrow if I'm in luck.

For now, I think I shall end this post with a sweet goodbye. xx

1st week done

I made it through the first week gruelingly. Well I can break down the days but there isn't much except maybe yesterday, today and on Tuesday. As you know, I'm back in college and I am suffering massive holiday ache. But alas, I must work to live on! It's an inevitable truth and life of a designer. What a perpetual routine. I do enjoy working again though the research this term is immense. I'm feeling the stress but I'll get there soon enough.

Anyways, yesterday I met up with my best friend and this surge of nostalgia wept through. My best friend since 13! I really don't know what I'll ever do without her. Looking back, we really had come a long way! I'm not sure how to feel at this point. It sounds putrid I know but I do feel kind of ancient! Well that's a lie, we meet at 2005 but it's been 9 years since we've kept in touch.

Wow.

And to think, another year more: it will be a decade!

That's terrifying.

But it's worth every memory.

To many more years of us! xx