2 years

I feel quite horrible for not posting this up on the day but it's just because I couldn't find any words to describe my emotions at that time. But it's been 2 years now, since we've been together and the moment feels just as bittersweet. Regardless, I will always reminiscence the day you walk into my life. I admit, we've been through a lot; thick and thin. It isn't always an undulating tide. There were many rough waves that we have to surf through and it wasn't easy. Despite all that, you're still here; right next to me.  I am definitely trying to change my ways, my thinking and my perspective to become a better person.

I have to be honest, at times, I might feel very jealous or upset with certain things that you do and I realised, it's becoming quite a nuisance for me. You would have probably noticed it by now.

It does hurt sometimes, when I think like that but everytime, I think of what we've been through together, it only strengthens my reason to stay with you every single time. The passing days are always filled with doubts, unanswered questions, worries, anxiety; always afraid that one day, when I wake up, you won't be around anymore. My dreams did not aid me either. I have dreams of you leaving me, for another, better person who perhaps give you more scares me to no end.

But all that, doesn't matter now. Because I come to realise that even after all that, I will still fall in love with the same person I met two years ago. And I will always cherish your kisses, your embraces, your smell but most of all your love and heart.

Thank you for being with me.

I love you.

Happy anniversary darling :)

Here's to 2 years and many more.

The nature of being afraid

Merry Christmas! I spent this lovely day with my flatmates and we ate like pigs. I practically chowed down so much roasted veggies, potatoes and yogurts, I might puke but here I am, writing this blog post. I even watched some movies with the mates and it was great fun. I really do miss having these intimate sessions with my flatmates and bond with them. It was afterall a blissful and peaceful Christmas.

 And oh meet B duck :D So adorable in it? 

Well the title of the post does not coordinate or relate well to the pictures above but I guess I can say is because, the past few days have been pretty deep for me. I barely went out for the winter break (the result of saving money and being a good girl.) But I promised myself to do a little bit more giving rather than receiving. I sent out lovely handmade postcards to my friends and flatmates, took pictures for my apartment's decoration and bought my boyfriend a book. All is good. 

I am trying very hard to put my faith and trust on something I well am, not in control of. Even though, at this point, I am finding it terribly difficult; it's all part of well long distance isn't it? A test of loyalty, trust, respect, honesty and understanding one better. At times, part of me just wants to be selfish; but I can't be like that all the time. 

I will be a better person. I promise.

xx

The Shootings

I am still quite horrified about what happened. I say this from the bottom of my heart. This post will have no pictures whatsoever but only just words, to show my deepest condolences to the families who have lost their beloved ones in the incident. I read the news yes and some might have mixed comments about the whole idea but if there's one thing to say: the children did not deserve to die.

I can never bring the heart to hurt a child let alone, murder one. In total of 26 were killed and 20 children (some resources say 18) DIED. They were shot. How could one be so barbaric? Even if the person is a sociopath, or a psychopath or anyone- no one deserves to die like that. Not CHILDREN. Not them. They did nothing to you. They did NOTHING at all.

They were just in the learning process of getting to know the world. They were discovering new things about the world itself. And you put an end to their journey just like that?

I have nothing to say except I can only pray that some justice will be enforced into this. Some sort of punishment to put an end to this horror. Nothing will ever soothe the poor broken hearts of the parents who lost their children but at least, to know that your child's murderer is being punished for his actions will suffice.

My condolences to the victims of the shooting in Connecticut.

Walking in Winter Wonderland

I remembered how it snowed so beautifully in London. It was quite a magical moment for me. I can't believe that time flies so quickly. It's already December and everyone says, nearing to the end of the world. I'm not sure how I like the sound of that but so far, I've done a few amazing things of my checklist. To have my hair dyed blue, going to the most amazing Big Bang concert (revealed in the next post) and now, visiting Winter Wonderland! So blessed :)

I went to this Magical place with my group mates and I absolutely love the atmosphere. Mulled wine, hot chocolate, games, food, ice skating, whole load of Santa CLAUS; seems a bit commercial? Haha, but it's a meaningful day in reality. A day of reunion and to be with your family. It's always something about a place like this that makes me feel so happy. Happiness is building in right now. I am in a better place at heart. As in, feeling more secure? Haha. 

Oh well. I guess I'll let the pictures do the talking.

My coursemates and I.

:)

Isn't it so PRECIOUS? :)

xx.

Blue Hair

Finally plucked the damn courage to dye my hair blue and after a lot of money saving: I finally did it! The process was painful and embarrassing (scared the hairdressers literally) but I love the result! It was different as I expected but the result was quite stunning!

I feel so much like a mermaid.

Such a beautiful colour :D

And I started playing around with my fibre optics and there were some really nice accidental shots like these. So pretty! Definitely my new prop from now on! :D

I need to go for Big Bang now! Ta! xx

Anddd it's doneeeeeee

So glad I'm able to breathe again. I am just wanting to update this blog since forever but wow, aha! The first term is finally done! I am excited overall about my grades and my holidays but so far, I am ready to kick back and relax. I've been editing some pictures that were backlogged.

I feel so refreshed looking at these lovely pictures. I'm going out in two hours' time to meet with my group mates! We're having our end of term dinner at Tottenham! :) It's going to be amazing! I will probably have a second blog post about the dinner as well!

These were taken 2 months ago. Time flies so quick! :O 

I'm kind of glad I'm still alive and kicking. The first term is quite amazing really. I admit, the problems were mere and stupid but I think the course has quite its own potential to succeed. I am liking the lecturers and the idea behind thinking thoroughly. I am eager to finish reading the book that I shall review very soon :) It's such a good book! I have mentioned to my friends that reading the foreword made me tear a little.

I shall clean up first :/ Eeep.

ta! xx